PFW:  My kingdom for a secondary

I'd pay real money for a defensive back who could stay with a receiver, not get lost on the field and defend a pass without causing interference.

Jerry Jones' problem is that he is  paying money for that - and not getting it.

Arlington Heights 14, OD Wyatt 0
TCU 44, University of S**t-Eating F**ks 45 (2 OT)
Dallas 21, Washington 18

Since I've already covered Heights, we'll come around to the Cowboys and finish up with what's becoming my weekly TCU rant.

The Dallas offense is about a half-step slow right now.  If it ever finds its rhythm, watch out.  They scored 21 over a Washington defense that, though it didn't have its best night, is an excellent defense in its own right and  got rooked on a couple of calls.  And all that despite not running very well, and misfiring on a few passes.  This offense ever gets in sync, they're going to be extremely dangerous.

Speaking of officiating, Norm Hitzges opined on the Ticket today that the NFL owes apologies to both teams for the zebras' horrendous performance last night.  The Redskins, in particular, were the victims of some Gawd™-awful calls - and Dallas didn't come away unscathed themselves.

As it was, the 'Skins nearly pulled this one out.  Mark Brunell was 25-43 for 325 and a couple of touches, and several times Dallas defensive backs had the deer-in-headlights look.  Particularly 2nd-year cornerback Terrence Newman, who's beginning to make a few folks wonder about him (*coughbustcough*).

In the end, however, it was clock management that did Washington in.  Two timeouts within three plays of each other, plus a failed challenge by coach Joe Gibbs left the 'Skins with no timeouts at the end of the game.  Facing 2nd and 1 from their 33 with 13 seconds left, Brunell launched a 46-yard pass to Rod Gardner down the left sideline.  Gardner caught the ball at the Dallas 21 with four seconds left; however, Roy Williams knocked him down in bounds, and Washington watched helplessly as time ran out.

Dallas will now enjoy their bye week before meeting the New York Football Giants the week after.

On to TCU.

I'm sorry.  I can't keep this charade up.  I've tried to pretend that Gary Patterson is a Division I-A college football coach, even when his Horned Frogs sucked eggs against that vaunted NCAA powerhouse, Northwestern State. (That's Division I-AA  Northwestern State, for those of you in Rio Linda who don't pick up sarcasm well.)

Patterson managed an 11-2 record against a bunch of squads that were down on their luck last year and didn't quite give the Frogs enough respect.

No one's overlooking TCU quite like that this year, and it shows.  But instead of stepping up his coaching performance, Patterson seems happy just to have his his weekly call-in radio show and his press luncheons - and if opponents torch his defense week after week, and his kicking game can't manage a decent snap for a kicker who's already shaky - then oh, well.

TCU let a USF team that doesn't exactly qualify as road warriors stay in the game by allowing their quarterback to play pitch-and-catch with his receivers.  Many times, those defensive backs looked as helpless as the Cowboys' DBs looked last night - that deer-in-the-headlights thing again.  And on those rare occasions when they had opportunity to get close enough to actually make a tackle, they failed miserably, as if USF had coated its uniforms with 10W-40.

The irony here is that Patterson, like Parcells, is supposed to be a defensive coach.  And with just a modicum of defense, TCU might be 4-0 - instead of 2-2, completely out of the national-ranking picture, and with virtually no hope of so much as a sniff of the Conference USA championship if this is the best they can play.

Patterson and athletic director Eric Hyman are always bitching & moaning about attracting more fans to their dilapidated old campus stadium.  And then Patterson's team comes out and stinks up the joint for two weeks straight in this and last week's debacle vs. Texas Tech.  Here's a news flash, guys:  People who buy tickets to your games have a reasonable expectation of seeing the home-team win.   For all your bleating Saturday night about how you supposedly know that we, the fans, have a choice in how to spend our hard-earned money and that you appreciate us spending it on you...you haven't played like it the last two weeks, and your head football coach hasn't coached like it, either.

Frankly, I've seen enough of Gary Patterson to know that he's not the answer at TCU.  It's time to show him the door and bring in a Division I-A caliber football coach.  And if Hyman won't do it, it's time to replace him, as well.

We'll have another go at a Perfect Football Weekend on Friday.  Meantime, I'm going to go try to get over this massive urge to shove my TCU season tickets up Gary Patterson's ass... (grumble)

Demoscummic debutantes

Mr. Minority has posted a couple of pics of the Demoscummic ticket.  He got them from what he calls "a stranger at a stock show in Houston", so, using See-BS' standards, they must be real - right?

Major spew warning in effect. (grin)